I am the new me. Rotating Header Image

I hate it when he is right.

A friend once told me that you can not rely on other people, you can only rely on yourself.

Every time he says this, I argue that I have great friends who I can absolutely rely on.

Turns out that, once again, he is right, you can’t rely on others.

Back in January, when I made the decision to run the BMO Vancouver Marathon on May 1st, I knew it was going to be a challenge, considering my line of work.

Being in the accounting business, April 30th is the biggest deadline of the years, so running a marathon the next day is definitely insane.  TO top it off, this year, April 30th is a Saturday, so that puts the tax deadline on May 2nd, the day AFTER the marathon.

But, unfortunately I gave in to the jealousy. I couldn’t stand sitting around watching all my friends get ready & not be doing it myself. So, I registered. I paid my $110, and started training.

When I made the decision to run with my friends, I was pretty sure I made it clear to all involved that this would be a HUGE challenge for me & that I would need their support. I clearly recall saying “I can do the training, and get myself there, but with work being so busy, I need help planning a place to stay & a ride home.”.  I also recall a specific conversation at the BMO Vancouver Marathon tweetup we held, when people were discussing sharing accomodations.  I made it more than clear that I was looking for a room to share & a ride home.

Well, it turns out that with less than a month to go until the marathon, all the people who were so willing to help at the beginning to training conveniently forgot their offers to help. Not a single one of them recalls their offers to pick up my race package because  I can’t get there for the expo. All the room share offers have been forgotten, as well as the transportation offers.

So, it turns out that with 11 days left until the marathon, I’m not sure if I can get there, or more specifically, get home.

I found a place to stay with a friend in Burnaby, and I am certainly capable of getting myself there.  The easiest answer is to drive on the ferry & drive to Burnaby, leave my car there & take the skytrain to & from the race. My worry comes in getting home the after the race.  There is no way to know in advance how I will feel after the marathon.  Last time I felt great, but then I have been crippled after some half marathons.

I HAVE to be at work the next morning. I can’t risk getting stuck in Vancouver because I am injured, or dehydrated, or otherwise unable to drive myself home.

So, after 3 months of training for marathon #2, it looks like I might have to sit this one out.





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  1. Katie says:

    The thing I find interesting about this is that you can ALWAYS rely on other people IF you are honest with them. Did you mindfully tell them outright that you wanted help. You keep illuding to the fact that you made it clear you were looking…. that’s not making plans completely. Did you sit these people down and say: Look, I’m having a hard time of this, can you PLEASE help me out.
    And also – have you offered the same support of them? If any of these people asked you the way you asked them, perhaps you would have reacted the same way – kind of forgetting the previous conversations?
    Look at it from someone else’s perspective, not your own. Did you really practice what you preach? Did you thank anyone for anything? Did you let anyone else down?
    It’s not that hard – you just have to be honest with yourself.

    1. iamthenewme says:

      Actually, yes, I was more than clear with people that I could only run this race with their support.

      I told them clearly from day one that, due to the fact that it was a busy time at work for me, I needed help.

      I specifically said that because of work, I needed them to take care of the accommodations and getting me home, and they just needed to let me know how much money I would owe them for that. I was of the understanding that the person I asked knew how difficult the timing of the race was for me because SHE specifically told me that it would be no problem because the person she lives with is in the same line of work and under the same time constraints as I was.

      I think the only place I went wrong was not checking up more frequently and more regularly that people actually remembered what we talked about and were following through on their part of the deal.

      1. Katie says:

        Ah, ok, that makes more sense. The impression in the blog post is that you weren’t all that clear.
        That’s a shame. I hope you are still able to make your marathon.